A part of the opening is Laurie and Doug giving decorating advice to a https://spankingporn.vip/ while-shifted Pilgrims. Fortunately, the Pilgrims are only actors, because real Pilgrims would most likely have the decorating duo in the pillory with their ears nailed to the wood. Laurie's violating costume codes (circa 1620) and Doug is, let's be honest here, Doug. If they didn't discover one thing to hate after one or two episodes they wouldn't be attempting laborious sufficient. This is followed by a shot of Amy Wynn and one other Pilgrim sawing a log with a two-person noticed whereas Ty tries to look busy. Ty suggests a cordless noticed. Well, that is kind of what it's already. The trenches: The room Doug shall be abusing is a kitchen/dining-room/residing-room combo. Which is, to my eyes, gaudy and cramped. And this stuff is new? Cripes. Homeowners: Tina and James. Laurie's sufferer room is an extended but not horrible-trying residing room. Its most important drawback is that it seems to be, nicely, really actually lived-in. But I'm being polite. I don't prefer it a lot, both. Homeowners: John and Barbie. (A blonde named Barbie. They're all blondes, aren't they?) They even have canines, so Barbie doesn't need something "too fancy", as a result of she has animals. You bought Laurie in there, you realize that? I'd drive this automobile right into a wall if it weren't for the opposite individuals on the street! Ah, Laurie and Doug go procuring. Laurie, being the great individual she is, is backseat driving, saying she knows how to get to Beacon Hill. She follows this up by proclaiming to the first set of ears she sees (an antiques dealer) that Doug's driving will not be up to par. She additionally gets the vapours (a minimum of, that is what it regarded like) when telling the supplier that she's responsible for half 100 grand in cash. Antique seller immediately tries to sell her every thing in arm's reach. He is aware of his customers, that is for sure. You've watched this present earlier than... right? Ah, one of many homeowners has already talked about that she desires to keep her beloved ground. And already I hear both carpenters speaking about their Designing Overlords replacing the floor. It's already shaping as much as be an everyday day at the races. Decadent: Within the strategy of ethical or bodily decay. Laurie buys a $2,800 chair and squeals that she's "sooooooooo decadent!" She also mentions that she has carte blanche, "Nobody to hold me accountable!" for what she does. (Calls up a screencap of the homeowners.) Yep, it is just a regular day on the races, all right. Ads without the commercials: Only Ty, Amy Wynn, and a digital camera crew might walk into a house Depot and get help instantly. Ty, ever the gentleman, asks to be helped discover the bathroom. Ty-dor the Burninator: Ty (who, driving a toy automotive in one other scene, spun out) supposedly blocked the fireplace lane of the house Depot he went to. Math time: if the wooden he is looking at (and wincing about the price) is $529 per sq. foot, and there's about one hundred sq. feet in the store, how much will the lawsuit for simply that lumber be if the place burns down? Ad executives. They execute ads. Throughout the industrial, we see Sony Vega advert number one. Do not forget that. The Perkinator: Paige explains the foundations, and looks to be about to burst before she mentions the $100,000. When she does point out it, there's much excitement and Barbie accuses Paige of being "full of it". When you imply full of perkiness, you're right. Meanwhile, Tina's vocabulary has devolved into "Stop it! Stop it!" I died in your arms tonight: Laurie, ever the grasp of the refined, tells the newly-arrived homeowners that she is "Dying, I'm dying for you!" Evidently Tina doesn't need Laurie useless - against the wishes of a few viewers members, one would suppose - as a result of she continues her litany of "Stop it!" in between other, more meaningful, words. Laurie additionally claims she's shaking, and she holds out her hand and shakes it to show it. (Holds out hand and shakes it.) Damn, so am I. Hard to sort with one hand, although. Gender mirrors: Both male homeowners seemed reluctant to join their wives in the big Excited Designer Hug. Don't they make sauce? Product placement alert: Doug's putting in Pergo floors. Crooooooooooooooowbar! Tina and James attempt to pry their neighbor's Tv out of an armoire, however it is wedged in tight. Much endeavoring lastly frees it of its moorings. My evil side wished to see them use a crowbar, but they did not, I guess because it's, you already know, a bigass expensive Tv. Damn, the destruction quotient will likely be surprisingly low this episode. Meanwhile, Doug unloaded some new cabinets. Woo! They'll destroy the outdated cabinets! No one can use old cabinets! Woo! Grrr! Hulk angry! Hulk run fingers although hair and sigh and say Hulk is confused! Laurie will, she claims, have a significant hissy fit if the carpet is glued. It isn't, so we're saved a song and dance, and as an alternative subjected to a song and dance about placing down maple floors. She's shaking her palms again too, however with both fingers. (Tries it.) TYPUNG WITGH Nose HARDF.L. Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrybar! Mark, Nathan, and John. No, they are not apostles, they're Doug's crew of pleasant Home Depot Product Placement At-Home Services helpers. Wow, between the extendible pointer stick he's been utilizing to point at things, the title "Operation Sophistication", and his army of builders, he'll be carrying a common's outfit for the designer chat at the end of the episode. They've additionally got a pry bar! MANLY DESTRUCTION TIME! Airhead vs. Gasbox: Laurie (to her huge and abyssal disappointment) can't change the gasbox fireplace, as it could take too lengthy. Given the shoddy-work horror stories you hear from some former Trading Spaces victims homeowners, I ponder at changing it anyway. I can see the headlines now: "Plymouth obliterated in fireball. Homeland Security hunting Al-Qaeda agent codenamed 'Laurie Smith'." Drawer Wars: Okay, first the 'Amy Wynn and Ty battle for the router bit instrument drawer' gags have been funny, however they quickly received severely creepy. I don't even need to know what the hell's occurring with these boxer-short-like abominations Ty whipped out - Is that a factor to make it appear to be your ass is hanging out? - however I'd wish to have words with someone over it. Painful phrases. Though I'm wondering at Amy Wynn's qualifier that that is the first time she and Ty have crossed paths "as carpenters". I'm secretly hoping it implies that the subsequent Trading Spaces spinoff will likely be Trading Spaces: Highlander. You recognize, Amy Wynn's walking down a dark alley, then there's that weird sound as Ty steps out of the shadows, they have a flashback to this scene, then they pull out swords and attempt to hack one another's heads off. (If it ever occurs, my prayers are with Amy Wynn. Oh, wait, I'm agnostic. Okay, my vitriolic words of hatred are with Ty, then.) Heeeeeeere we are, born to be kings.... Well, I guess this Amy Wynn vs. Ty arm wrestling is as close as I'll get to an epic battle at the end of which there could be only one. Paige breaking it up is hardly epic, as nicely. Spank me, I've been a nasty unhealthy boy.... Paige took to slapping guys on the ass this episode. First was Ty (although she missed and bought him closer to the kidney) when he made a ultimate play for Amy Wynn's tool drawer. It will need to have been spontaneous, else I'm positive Ty's scriptwriter (he should have one, no mannequin-turned-carpenter might suppose up this a lot dialogue) would have put in some cheap-shot comment about having fun with the spanking. Her second sufferer was a homeowner, John (who's working with Doug), but she appeared to mean it as encouragement as he walks off digicam to do some work. He appeared to take it as encouragement, as I heard an off-digital camera "Woo-hoo!" just a few seconds after the slap. I presume the delay was John quickly checking to verify that Paige, not Doug, had slapped him. I'm so disenchanted I want to bust up something! They did not bust up the cabinets. Paige is as dissatisfied as I'm. Seems that John, not content with getting his house accomplished as he works right here, is taking the cabinets for his garage. Aww, boo. Recyclers be DAMNED! On tonight's Trading Spaces, Ty helps Laurie get in touch with her inside pimp: At least, that is what it appears to be like like as he provides her his pimp-flavah huge "$$$" ring and matching dollar-sign neck weight throughout their dialogue of the brand new mantle for the fireplace. "Yeah, just cowl your marriage ceremony ring with that." Evidently he's not attempting to make her appear to be a single madam as a lot as externalizing her need to spend and spend and spend. Well, he is heading in the right direction then. I just did not notice that Laurie's internal needs appeared so much like a homey wit' bling-bling. There's bought to be therapy for that. Evidently, the bling-bribe was enough to blank Laurie's thoughts of good concepts: Ty gets to design the leisure center. It cantilevers. Sounds fascinating. Though, if a new viewer tuned in while he was describing it in detail and how it's going to tie into the room, they'd be questioning why the designer's carrying a tool belt and who the woman within the gaudy jewelry is. Oh captain my captain: Doug's bought a battle room set up. I tell ya, he will be Four-Star General Doug before this is over. Oh my God, he's acquired a wall-sized chart. And Paige is looking it good. For Hastur's sake, do not encourage him! He's additionally summoned Mark, an electrician, from the misty deep. His army is increasing with each passing minute; before long no mortal will be able to stop his reign. The electrician is going to install lights (recessed fixtures) across the fireplace. Wait a minute, that's Mark the electrician, John the homeowner, and Mark, Nathan, and John the unrelated three-man Home Depot collective. Man, this goes to get confusing. No, it's not yellow. It's a dark mild off-off-yellow. Laurie first appears to be admitting to the fact that her paint palette is, nicely, restricted. "You realize, I attempt to fool everybody, and it is like... naaaah." Yellow. It will be yellow. "I do not see this color as boring. It's a lovely wealthy color and I'm using the improper device to try get the can prime off with...." No, you're using the right software wrong. I can see the lid shifting almost an inch off the can on the far facet. Since the paint stirrer she's using is simply going to get coated in paint anyway, she should simply stick it within the can on the boundary between the open part of the lid and the caught half, and twist. As she reveals the paint - which is yellow - she fires the first salvo in her regular battle over the exact shade. "I know it appears more yellow there" - That's because it is yellow! - "but it dries a really sort of earthen...." An earthen yellow perhaps? James appears to have seen the show before, as he mumbles one thing that appears like "It dries...." like he's going to say "It dries yellow." however trails off. Laurie, undaunted by my muttered insults and James's nebulous feedback, continues. "It's known as 'Chestertown Buff'." Seems like a porn star. Our Yellow Du Jour has 37 results in Google, it's so in style. Laurie paints some on the blue wall, so we can all see the glory of not-yellow that she's seeing. On the wall, it looks yellow. So yellow, the truth is, that even she's forced to admit it. "And on this blue, it is looking really yellow." No, my dear, it isn't the blue that is making it yellow, it's the yellow that is making it yellow. Tina tries to be consoling and compromising. I do not suppose she's seen much of this present earlier than, then. She says "I think Barbie needed yellow. I imply, we will say yellow, okay? We will say buff, however it's yellow." But Laurie's not accomplished yet, no sir. After closing her eyes (to avoid the damning yellow proof, I presume) and tensing up like she's simply stepped into one thing disgusting, she says "No, however it's not yellow! Eeeee!* Let me go get the swatch; that is gonna drive me loopy, it is not y'all." (*To translate that "Eeee!" into written English: That's "Eeee!" as in "Eeee! This is unpleasant!" not "Eeee! A MOUSE!" or "Eeee! We're finished!" A foul, however not scary, eeee.) Tina, getting sick of Laurie's avoidance of the painting (and the writing) on the wall, factors at the yellow and says "Laurie, yellow." as if she was introducing them to one another. I'm pondering they're going to want to add a tenth circle to Hell simply to accommodate the unhealthy Trading Spaces designers. Another one! Doug has hired an "artisan" named Ron. Doug explains how he hires artwork groups to do creative work for all his excessive end clients. I'm positive that may put Barbie at ease, as soon as she goes house and learns that Laurie hasn't hired anyone to this point and is burning time arguing about yellow. Speaking of which.... And another one of these too.... For each hired hand Doug summons, Laurie has an insistence that it's not frickin' yellow. (Not that she'd ever use such phrases herself, no....) Paige has appeared to echo Laurie's sentiment that it that it wants two coats. However, Paige says they want it simply to verify it is actually, shock surprise, yellow. I wonder on the superb precision with which Laurie reaches the top of the sentence "It's Chestertown Buff, it isn't..." simply as Paige chimes in with "And it looks..." so Paige and the homeowners' shout of "Yellow!" concurrently drowns out Laurie and ends her sentence. Laurie, in response, throws a miniature foot-stamping tantrum. "No it is not, it is BUFF!" She follows this with a giggle, which reminds me of a Usenet troll who follows a flame with a smiley face, so you can by no means fairly tell if he's insulting or just tactless. I do hope her one-yr-old son Gibson is watching, he'll study some nice ideas for being a brat simply by watching Mommy! Then we'll see a toddler sturdy enough to hoist his mom along with her own petard. Ahhh! Prison of love flashback! No, it isn't fairly brown-grey sufficient, but Ron explains they'll be placing a blue-gray plasterish/paintish product on the walls, which will then be speckled with the same stuff to make a textured wall. Doug does the first coat (utilizing a roller), then Barbie does the speckling (utilizing a brush). The speckling appears good. Paige fault: Laurie appears to have conveniently forgotten that $a thousand of her price range (she thankfully has $1500 left, I used to be so nervous) is going to Paige, to take a homeowner searching for the "Paige Gift", an item of the homeowner's choice that the designer may have to make use of in the room. My suggestion to Tina and James: $1000 of vivid green paint, or one of the other colors Laurie can not use as a fundamental level of her designs. Oh, and a can of stock-normal yellow, just for comparability purposes. Laurie, feeling the money slipping out of her fingers, bites her finger in considered the way to spend her last $500 before Paige grabs it. Apparently, Paige already has some ideas about where to take the homeowners purchasing. She says it is to Laurie's liking. Laurie ain't shopping for it. Where's the red-hot eye poker? Or the cyanide? The going-to-industrial bumper was a shot of Ty smothering Amy Wynn with the creepy boxer shorts. Within the immortal words of A.K. Swift: "Watch me vomit!" Speaking of vomiting.... Sony Vega advert number two. Remember that. Oh, and doesn't the ditty in the background of the "E-Bay bidding" Earthlink ad sound just like the Moon Patrol theme? The Howling: Tina and James discuss how lucky their neighbors are to be scoring all-new furniture. (And your previous cabinets, sister.) Tina, however, mentions that they have a big ol' "Marmaduke" canine (That is the sort of animals they've?) that was allowed on the old furniture. Oh, I'm certain that $2,800 chair goes to have high resale worth when, as a substitute of something like Laurie's dainty little hips, it may have an enormous mass of slobbering dogflesh parked on it. And do not forget no matter fabric Laurie's received in mind for this room.... James needs to sink their $one thousand gift into an excellent gate. Meanwhile, Paige springs her Paige Gift on John and Barbie. I discover she does not stress the "Has to make use of it within the room." factor. Or indeed, even have Doug round. Ty vs. Ty: A shot of Amy Wynn. Something sails in from off-camera and hits her, eliciting an "Ow! That one hurt!". I was sure it was Ty, however instead it is Doug proving he is usually a bastard, too. Doug is getting Amy Wynn to make a table. The table of her goals. Dougie boy, the desk of her dreams is prefab. Though she does caress that wooden actually lovingly. Hordes of men watching want to be that wood. The desk will be six by three in mahogany and maple. Amy Wynn promises to have the building of it executed tonight, so it can be finished up tomorrow - evidently the crew does not have the planer needed to deal with the job. Doug's military of teamsters vs. Laurie's seamster: Finally, Laurie's first signal of hired assist, Daniel, seems. Or, more accurately, Laurie drags Tina into the dank basement-cum-sweatshop where she's trapped the poor man. He's a "professional 'stitcher', is what the correct lingo is for a man". So, what is it for a girl? A stitchress? A stitchrix? A stitchrice? Or might it presumably be a 'stitcher' as well? All of it sounded like she was stressing that he was a man. He's a man, we could tell, he seems to be like one, he can sew, large deal, let's transfer on. Tina has been taken into the dungeons so she can iron. Appliances are higher than leisure: Doug speaks to the homeowners about their Paige reward. They're leaning more in the direction of dwelling leisure, encompass sound, and many others. Doug is steering them towards kitchen appliances. Did the man not price range for them, or what...? Dougby and Pokey: Doug remains to be tapping and poking at issues with his little pointer, from Amy Wynn's wood to the cabinets. He's additionally demanding to be saluted by his Home Depot costs, now. One of the house Depot folks, who I'm calling MarkNathanorJohn, mentions (at Doug's repeated proddings for a realistic ETA on getting the cabinets executed) that it will be a few hours "as long as we have no more interruptions". Doug asks MarkNathanorJohn if he is implying that Doug is an interruption. MarkNathanorJohn denies it, however homeowner John turns quisling and says that MarkNathanorJohn is indeed implying that. Looks like John's jockeying for the place of Trusted Lieutenant. So Laurie carries a headshot of Doug along with her wherever she goes? Well, at the least it isn't a headshot of Frank.... Laurie is hiding her face behind a monochrome headshot of Doug (very attractive image, I must admit, in that noncommittal man means of admitting another guy appears to be like hunky). She's doing this as a part of a posh and entirely nonscripted subterfuge specializing in stealing Doug's electrician away to do her electrics work. The gag, whereas drained, isn't as bad because it sounds because that is all shot by way of the Paige Cam. Laurie, who normally appears at the very least sort of cute, tends to look like a fish on the Paige Cam. For most of this Paige Cam second, we won't see her face. Consider all of the unborn nuts that died for this mantle! Ty has busted out a new walnut wood mantle for Laurie (from a photograph of a similar mantle). Laurie says that, regardless of the haste, it's the most stunning thing she's ever seen. Well, use good wood as a substitute of MDF, that happens. Also, working with the Banyan logo looming over him in all probability reminds him of his evil company masters. You do not displease the evil corporate masters, for they are delicate and fast to downsize. I, for one, welcome my evil corporate masters! It's the rattling general they appointed I have problems with: Amy Wynn speaks to the Paige Cam for a moment on how, despite only working on one house, it feels like four due to all that's occurring. She additionally fondles the wooden once more. Mahogany. I'd fondle it too. Doug appears to have unusual ideas. Doug needs to stain the mahogany black. I know nothing about wooden, but Amy Wynn (getting confused over the whole affair) sounds like she's heading in the right direction when she explains the next: Doug desires the wooden darkish, but would not seem to be considering that finishing it's going to darken it to start with. Staining it in addition is simply going to make it appear to be they painted it black. The wooden grain can be lost in the blackness. Doug's ears don't seem to be burning purple during this: He's with his electrician as the fellow installs the last of the halogen ceiling lights. Doug plays with the dimmer a bit. Maybe he can sense the approach of immortals: Ty, sensing James's strategy, turns and greets him without any apparent cues that James should be there. For his next trick, he gets James to saw a bit of wood. Ty then goes on to show Laurie his sketchbook page devoted to the cocktail desk he is doing. I'm glad that the digicam angle allows us to see inside the sketchbook and verify it is a picture of a desk: Laurie gasps with such depth on the sketch that, if we could not see it, we might surprise what else Ty's been sketching. Appliances are better than leisure redux: So that is why Doug would not want his folks spending their $1,000 Paige Gift cash on entertainment. There's a Sony Vega forty two inch plasma Tv sitting in a trailer outdoors. Surround sound, pc that's built-in with the whole mess if Doug is to be believed, the entire shebang. How good's the safety on these shoots, and any concept in the event that they're doing another $100,000 episode? John's thought on the bins of costly know-how? "Good factor this is going to James, 'trigger I would not have the ability to determine it out." (Blink. Blink.) Come ON! You're a guy! Tv-related toys and the obtaining thereof are some extent of honor for most males! You have to be on your knees praying for considered one of this stuff! You sissy! Of course, I would not want one either, I'd slightly a bigass monitor for my 3.06 GHz Pentium box, but I admit my sissiness. And my geekiness. This promo of kinds was, all in all, a handy solution to do an in-show Sony Vega plug to match those we have seen twice to date within the advert blocks. In unrelated news, apparently John "gained the coin toss" (which was also off-digital camera... hmm) and is going out with Paige to hunt down the elusive Paige Gift. Barbie is disillusioned that she has to remain house while her husband will get to exit with Paige. Good thing she missed the ass-slapping and the "Woo-hoo!" some time back, else she'd be more than just disillusioned. I additionally notice that John will not be so anxious about his spouse staying dwelling with Doug and all these burly Home Depot development employees. Oh ye of a lot religion. Add an ad rant: I do not like screaming babies in advertisements. But this Stainmaster Carpet one really will get me: Daddy places his incessantly screaming child on the carpeted ground while he grabs a stuffed animal. Baby falls asleep immediately. As they plug the comfort of the carpet, a disclaimer fades in at the underside of the display screen: "It's endorsed infants not sleep on their stomachs." As somebody watching with me mentioned: "It's endorsed babies not sleep on their stomachs, however this one is not ours so we don't give a rattling." Zoooom! The show roars back with a shot of Ty driving a souped-up golf cart, shouting to female pedestrians*, and passing a van studying "The (Something) of Mark Connolly". (*The sound has been muted for the musical back-from-industrial sting, so I don't know what he says.) Kid in a sweet shop time: Laurie's so completely satisfied about one thing that she has each James and a digicam crew in tow as she approaches it. It is a truck. Within the truck is furnishings. And on the furniture is... fabric! Laurie expresses her love for the fabric, and begins caressing the first piece visible by the transport plastic. She continues by giving a plug to the furniture maker and explaining how she chose the fabric for the furnishings. (In fact she wouldn't accept stock upholstering!) She lovingly details, with appropriate closeups, how the yellow in a single piece ties in to the yellow of another piece. Question: Why are these two pieces of furniture covered in pale yellow and yellow/acid green stripes, when the partitions are, by Laurie's insistence, not yellow at all? Why are the chairs not Chestertown Buff? Or camel? Or any of considered one of Laurie's odd paint names? Why? Because she loses herself in the description of the fabric and doesn't catch herself utilizing the forbidden word.... YELLOW! The costs she quotes, at James' request? $4900 for the sofa, $4200 for the love seat, $3900ish for a chair, and someplace between $1600 and $2600 (Laurie's misplaced count) each for two other chairs. Custom fabrics have their value. Doug abuses the peons and appeases his masters: During Laurie's furniture lovefest, we minimize away for the following bits: 1) Amy Wynn shows her progress on the desk to Doug. They argue about the completion time, ending with Amy Wynn's "Fifteen (minutes) AND You're not STAINING IT!" 2) Doug and his pointing stick meet with MarkNathanorJohn. MarkNathanorJohn explains how they're putting in the new cabinets and the way he simply, as a result of he's a nice guy, knocked together a bit of conduit so a floor vent that was useless beneath the old ground cupboards will now redirect out into the kitchen. Doug says how much he loves MarkNathanorJohn's work. The gods of Home Depot smile and nod and see it is sweet. They promise to give Doug one other slave to push round. 3) Amy Wynn exhibits Barbie learn how to do mitered edges with a chop noticed. Get shifting or I'll plant another one in your ass! Paige and her slapping pal John are off to blow $1000. And so they're off in a stretch limo. Paige notices that John appears nonchalant in regards to the limo and the $a thousand money Paige is brandishing. Of course he is, he is bought Paige in the backseat with him and he's subsequently routinely kicked into "suave" mode. I imply, Paige within the backseat of a limo with plenty of cameras, what more might a man want? For the rest of this shopping journey, I'm calling John "Spanky". Ty shows extra of his sketchings to ladies: Tina's learning about the table that makes Laurie gasp. Tina, in contrast, is gasp-free. Meanwhile, Barbie's not an apt pupil at Amy Wynn's chop noticed. The blade stops halfway by means of a piece of wooden and the machine begins screaming like a banshee with its leg in a bear lure. Amy Wynn has Barbie cease and explains what happens when you set an excessive amount of power on the handle. Barbie, supposedly wiser for the lesson, then begins up again and the screeching begins once more. Reacting to the "an excessive amount of power" screeching, she places each arms on the handle and starts utilizing twice as much force as before. Now commences Amy Wynn shouting "TURNITOFFTURNITOFFTURNITOFF!" over the blade's unholy rasp. The blade off, she calmly (I do not know the way) says "You've got my noticed a little offended." Well, the noticed might be indignant, but I don't think it's the saw that is in all probability seeing visions of twisting this Barbie doll's head till it comes off. Ty packs his wood and Tina into a automobile to go on a quest for heavier hardware facilities. Guy doing gal issues: Shh, it's a Best Buy. Shhhh! Paige and Spanky arrive at a Best Buy, a undeniable fact that is only apparent in the event you see the reflected emblem and the occasional in-store signal. I'm guessing they didn't pay enough advert dollars. Now, we see Spanky's fantasies about going out with Paige dashed hopelessly in opposition to the rocks of reality. While she is a girl, and he a man, there's still one thing separating them: She's a woman, and he is a man. A girl and a man who are buying. Paige starts to mull over the relative benefits between a toaster and a toaster-oven, while Spanky just needs to seize the very first thing that looks like a toaster and go. Paige, being the good hostess, offers in easier than any self-respecting lady ever should. Gal doing man issues: She's out with Ty. Shhhh! While on their area trip to the Magic Land of Big Routers, Ty - referring to himself within the third person - corrects Tina's misconceptions of a high-tech router, which he claims is just not so much like a "funky saw" (in Tina's phrases) as it is just like the Terminator. Insert your California recall joke here. However, Ty rapidly defers to the Keeper of the Router for more complex information. On this the Keeper fails, basically regurgitating Ty's words but with extra jargon and fewer motion movie references. Guy doing gal things, half 2: It's a bust. And cease taking a look at Paige's! Paige declares the buying trip "a bust". Now we all know Best Buy didn't pay a lot. But Spanky has an idea! A Playstation for the children! Imagine playing that on the bigscreen Tv! Paige says, "Oh, dude, you might be considering!" What he hasn't considered is that there's going to be a holy warfare over that Tv when the mother and father want to look at cable and the children need to play Crash Bandicoot. Gal doing man things, part 2: What-what-WHAT? Ty discusses something with Tina over the router noise. It sounds to me like "I really feel the goowa bafudgeit! 'Cuz I fava mudgeit! Az az a wonderful factor!" Tina responds with "Take a walk all the way down to my house subsequent!" I think Ty's talking about how you can also make beautiful things with a big finances. Nepotism! Doug has hired an outdated coworker (effectively, an outdated manager, I feel - Doug used to work in his store) named Chris to help Amy Wynn do some wainscoting work. Doug kisses Amy Wynn to speed up the work. Chris declines a similar boon. That's a lovely wainscoat: So, of two pronunciations of 'wainscoting' I present in all of the dictionaries I checked and one I found only in a few, they went for the rarer one. Okay, effective. I hear "Postal 2" is admittedly good. Let's get that. Ah, the wonders of selecting a recreation to go along with the PS2. After Paige and her pal show their incompetence at enjoying, Spanky grabs a recreation and says "This seems like a child's sport." An incredibly scientific technique to do it, in comparison with, say, the ranking. Paige says it seems to be extra like a child's sport than, say, (Paige grabs semirandom title) "this". Some rewinding and fastforwarding later and i realized it was Everquest! Bwa-ha-ha! An excellent plug for the Evercrack Elven Princess and her twin Boobs of Fanboy Attraction +5! Paige, happy about their reasoned selection of sport, lets out a scream. Little doubt the other customers, who I'm positive are even now being held in the far facet of the shop by TLC security goons, have been pleased to listen to her whoop of ecstasy. Lil' Miss Eloi visits her pet Morlock: Laurie gasps, either because her basement stitcher has completed the gold desk skirts he was doing, or as a result of the Paige whoop in the last scene deafened her. "Oh, it is so great!" Definitely the skirt, then. Seeing one finished, with yellow-gold topper fabric, elicits a further half-moaned "Oh, that is lovely." I said it, there's an orgasmically joyous squeal developing. Are they sporting seatbelts? With 770 dollars left after shopping for the PS2 - It was only $230 after taxes, with a recreation? - Paige and Spanky discuss their next stop. Spanky, clearly making an attempt to recall the road from memory, says: "What about Home Depot has a... a... residence store!* Home Style... store! And it is all excessive-finish appliances... uh, or hello-excessive-finish** issues for your own home." He then adds a hastily-mumbled, "We will go there." *Paige quietly begins to immediate him earlier than he catches himself. **He offers the PS2 box he is holding a slap to emphasize his level - or his frustration - here. Poor Spanky, Paige is making you work on your new cabinets. In all fairness, though, Paige's angst-ridden look, supposedly as she was weighing benefits of the 20 minute one-method journey to the home Depot store, adopted by a determined "STEP ON IT!" to the limo driver, was only nominally extra authentic and much more annoying than Spanky's hack job on the home Depot line. In another dimension, Doug pushes "Barbie Doll" into some sewing, so she "steps on it" and zips through about $5 of the 75-dollar-a-yard silk curtains in an instant. Doug admonishes her and speaks menacingly of messing up 300 dollars in silk. Now all Barb has to do is tick off Paige and she'll have aggravated the entire holy trinity of Designer, Carpenter, and the Perky Host. Poor woman, tv life isn't treating her nicely at all. Though, if Doug's using 75-greenback-a-yard silk for drapes, what's Laurie going to do to trump him? $200 per yard? And one other thought: If Doug's so anxious concerning the silk, why's he drinking right over it? Meanwhile, with the competent feminine homeowner.... Ty, now back on the home, takes a break from the cocktail desk of routing wonders to indicate Tina how his grasp plan on the shelving system goes. After a lot moaning and groaning, he suits the leisure center shelving system into place on the long run wall mount. They do not precisely slide as much as they can be yanked out of place and stuck right into a barely different horizontal place. But hey, higher to have a snug fit than to have all your CDs fall out of the shelf. He also known as down the routing magic on the shelving system, to make effective horizontal grooves into which CD jewel cases fit. Tina reiterates her desire to get Ty in her house. Then he says "Are you crazy? There is not any room for me over there!" Oh, nice. Now Tina is aware of about the Legions of Doug ravaging the land whereas she was locked within the basement with a stitcher. I went to the World Expo in Montreal. It was way cooler than this. Paige and Spanky pull up in front of the Expo Design Center. I thought they'd the incorrect place until I noticed the relatively tiny writing "A house Depot Company" under the identify. Between his manly procuring technique and his admitted lack of technology ability, he goes for the blender that, as Paige says, simply has an on and off swap. My blender's older than I'm and it has extra options than that. We now pause for a break from the Spank & Mindy show. Back home, Barbie is angry (heh heh) that Paige and Spanky are off having fun. Doug turns the screws a bit about the cash, the limo, Paige.... Hey, I'd somewhat him off in a limo with Paige and a thousand dollars than him off alone in a limo with a thousand dollars. Paige shouldn't be a lady now, she's a lady who's procuring. Whole 'nother being right there. She's about as sexy as a useless fish to an average guy proper now. Doug turns the screws a bit more, invoking the work "perky". Because you understand that each screaming tryst is described as "perky". Spanky is doing all the homework tonight. Bad, unhealthy Spanky. We now end our pause. Paige, showing her perkiness, attempts to purchase much of the shop earlier than realizing her funds won't hold. She screams a bit too. I hope Barb didn't hear that. After the business, and with darkness lurking exterior the home windows, they arrive house. Doug struggles with the video game title "Jak and Daxter", renaming it "Jak and Dax. Ter." Barb hopes they've more than that. Paige: "In fact We now have More than THAT!" I hoped she'd say they blew all of it on champagne, a sizzling tub, and a few strippers. But it's a family show. Not that Paige dresses all that much heavier than the Everquest babe. (Though Paige has by no means been chained to an altar, a lot to the dismay of some of the fanbase.) Doug seems to be anticipating more than six(ish) boxes. When there isn't, he falls back into diplomat mode and says "Well, that is a lot! Cool-cool-cool-cool." Paige is $sixty eight beneath finances, by the best way. It's sunny once more! Ty drives out to see Amy Wynn. He makes use of, in fact, his super golf cart. He almost goes into the identical spin he did with a toy automotive at the highest of the episode. Amy Wynn has sufficient faith to not dive for cowl, the idiot. The 2 carpenters commiserate about their workloads and exalt at the true Wood they're utilizing. Amy Wynn explains Doug's want to abuse the mahogany with ebony stain. Ty, being Ty, says "Ebony and mahogany? Ain't that a track?" Sadly, Amy Wynn would not belt-sand his face off. It's dark once more? Paige announces the fading daylight, which has began to fade after its temporary stint of being dark, then mild once more. The second-shift Home Depot persons are placing Doug's floor in. He berates Spanky - sorry, "John" - for being out all day with Paige. Laurie reveals off her maple floors. Cinnamon-colored maple floors. Brown, who'da thunk it? Though it does look nice. Homework: General Doug's two conscripted grunts shall be painting the ceiling while the house Depot hirelings do the floor. That strikes me as a dance and a half, except everybody learns how to wall-walk. Laurie needs her folks to put in the floor. Oh, wait, she's just kidding! A four-individual Home Depot crew are doing the ground. In actuality, the homeowners need to polyurethane the wall-shelf thingy and paint the molding for the room. Paige confronts Doug on the wood staining. He refuses to discuss it, for he is the overall. Except he can't tell the distinction between house and Home Depot anymore. Paige says they're both delirious. The legions are in all probability considering relieving him of command. Doug clearly hasn't found the trick of mainlining some caffeine crystals. If it doesn't kill you, you'll stay up for weeks! Oh, and father mutant children. Paige additionally uses the super golf cart to drive Laurie home, or to whatever momentary domicile is serving the position thereof. When Laurie lists the day's achievements, Paige responds with "No! Get out!" and stops the cart. Laurie finishes speaking and will get out of the cart. Wow, I did not suppose Paige actually meant that determine of speech actually. Abandoning Laurie in the course of nowhere with nothing however a digital camera crew, floodlights, and no matter transportation the camera crew's utilizing? How will she ever get house? What a heartless bitch. No-drip paint roller: Barbie and John focus on the painted ceiling. They've religion in Doug, even though they suppose it's weird to paint a ceiling. Woah, that's saying one thing. It's saying one thing else that John's utilizing a clean white roller to paint the ceiling grey. Tiring of this feat, he additionally helps set up the crown molding. The son of Appliances are better than entertainment: Paige, with an umbrella and in several clothing from the day's filming, springs the free Tv/speakers/and so forth. factor on James and Tina. Wow, I assume self-confessed tech-illiterate John is getting a fancy-schmancy Tv as well. Paige calls Tina "Dude!" but forgets that the Dell Dude and his ilk made that little bit of vernacular gender-impartial. She says "I simply known as you both dudes! I am delirious!" Maybe we should relieve her of command. I know this guy named Joe who's bought internet hosting expertise. Paige then springs the pc shock as well. Tina responds with "Cut the s---!" and is wise enough to comprehend that she's going to be getting related surprises. James, after Paige leaves, suggests asking for even more stuff, since everything they've thought of so far has been included. Ah, wise homeowner desires to milk this for all it's price. Day 2. Well, Day 1.9999: Doug, in more informal duds as effectively, gets to lug the still-perky and nonetheless-informally-dressed Paige into the half-finished room (at 2 AM) to check the paint job. He sees spots on the ceiling. I feel he's just seeing spots, interval. He sends Paige house for her beauty sleep. Maybe he is seeing spots and thinks she's got acne or something. Barbie says that Paige doesn't need magnificence sleep. Doug kisses Paige on the cheek. Paige says, dreamily - as a result of she's about to fall asleep - "I really feel extra beautiful already!" and leaves. First Amy Wynn, now Paige. My God, I'm getting jealous of Doug. Someone shoot me. Over at Casa Del Maple Floor, one of the pleasant hardworking Home Depot people (who work all evening on things for everybody, I'm positive) semi-jokingly decides to take a five hour espresso break. His head's probably on a pike at Home Depot's company HQ proper now. Paige, feeling considerably useless with the pile of trained professionals around, lastly goes home. Her meandering speech makes me suppose the left facet of her brain (or her scriptwriter) has already gone to sleep. Whatever she's taking, I want some. Paige, inhumanly perky as ever, shows up after three hours of sleep to begin Day 2 proper. Laurie, upon seeing the floors, sits down on them and begins.... What? Oh, no, do not do the splits. Don't do them, don't do them don'tdothem don'tdothemdon'tdothem ARRRRRRRGH! Well, not fairly the splits, however no matter it was, it was neither ladylike nor within my vary of consolation. Fortunately, the marble fireplace is not giant enough for her to sprawl on. Doug finds his prices taking a look at some electronics and the instruction manuals of said electronics. John claims there isn't any English instructions, only French. You recognize he simply burned the English ones so he wouldn't get stuck having to learn them and put the stuff collectively. Jester romances: Now that Doug's army has apparently left and is wantonly redecorating the countryside, I'd wish to entertain you with a little bit of purple prose. She, with gentle and adoring contact, caressed her one true love. She recited her love's virtues in detail, for all to hear. She took this symbol of perfection into her arms and proclaimed with a breathy voice that "This, this is drapery." Yep, Laurie's drapes have arrived. And that i defy anybody to write a extra accurate description of Laurie's conduct on this scene. Oh, by the way in which, this scene also introduces Greg, the second of Laurie's fabric wranglers - in comparison with Doug's, say, none - one she probably had in an outsourced dungeon. As her latest (and only second, not counting the ground labor) indentured slave hangs the drapes, Laurie lays some carpet, customized minimize by a firm in her adopted dwelling town. It appears to be like faintly like a large Tetris piece. Doug's timing is manner off. Maybe he wants a new belt. Doug is actually in search of Barbie and John's okay for something. Seems that he would not like the tile on the fireplace and would like to put some marble up. Considering that he inpergonated the tile flooring in opposition to the homeowner's previous needs, I do not think he ought to start searching for permissions at this late stage. Nice legs. Amy Wynn's working on the desk legs. Paige has turned traitor and is saying staining the table won't be so dangerous. Perhaps General Doug threatened to have her shot... ... and doubtless with the nail gun he is utilizing to nail the wainscoting onto the wall. We love Greg. We wish to give Greg a medal. As Laurie's giving one of her trademark Speeches About Things She Doesn't Know Much About, she says "The pleat up top - he did the pinched pleat as a result of...." Greg interrupts her. "Gathered." Laurie responds with a sideways look and a terse "Thank you." before persevering with her lecture on how the drapes have gathered pleats to make them contemporary and informal. She ends with, "So these are real relaxed" - instantly she hastens her speech - "Italian-silk-drapery-that-cost-six-thousand-dollars!" She also twitches like she's fighting a want to do the Funky Chicken. Simply because he doesn't remember it doesn't mean he will not miss it! Doug, Paige, and Barbie sit on the floor and begin unwrapping the various kitcheny accouterments Doug bought. So many he is misplaced monitor of what he bought. Paige, maybe nonetheless a bit mentally fried after solely 3 hours of sleep, starts enjoying with some contraption that looks like wooden spoons tied together at their middle. Not garnering sufficient consideration with this, she grabs a bowl and inverts it, not noticing that there was something inside. The online impact of that is that she dumps one tissue-lined and presumably-fragile object onto another probably-fragile object. Doug has the horror-adopted-by-a-quick-tempered-scolding response you'd anticipate of somebody in his footwear. Then Barbie pipes up and says, in a tone I have not heard since my last encounter with an elementary college tattle-tale, "She's simply trying to get you over budget. She's gonna break it!" Ladies and gentlemen, we have now the hat trick. First Amy Wynn with the saw, then Doug with the sewing machine, now Paige with the equipment. She has put in a strong try at ticking all three of them off. Because it was, the dropped object was simply wood bowls and nothing else seemed damaged. Just a bit extra fabric... Laurie's acquired Tina and James engaged on reupholstering kitchen-sort chairs. She tries to freak Tina by appearing like Tina staple-gunned her finger. Wait 'til you get again to your home and see the drapes. You'll have an embolism! Doug exhibits the difference between a $1,500 high-end lamp that he obtained from somebody in the same building as his art studio and a $sixty five thrift-store purchase. Not much, the way in which he's talking. I guess he doesn't need to purchase from that individual again.... Barbie gasps on the $1,500 worth tag. Paige and Barbie want the expensive one. Just on the color, I have to agree. Though $1,435 looks as if an enormous markup just for the distinction between icky mustard yellow and sky blue. Oh, and remember the costly one's teardrop upper half, in comparison with the other one's cylindrical upper half. And the jangly issues. Doug has saved not less than one among his legion for the second day: The artisan named Ron who's painting some plasterish trendy-art thingy on the wall. Flee from the market: Laurie exhibits off her mass of accessories. Tina says it seems to be like a flea market. Laurie says it is far dearer than a flea market. Yeah, but it surely nonetheless appears like a flea market. Laurie: A $a hundred tchotchke continues to be a tchotchke. As if in response to this, she whips out a nineteenth century sunburst Italian mirror. Tina asks how outdated it is. Laurie as an alternative tells Tina when she thinks it was made. "It's most likely late, late 1800s. Like 1890, in all probability flip-of-the-century." Excuse me, but if it was turn-of-the-century wouldn't it be a twentieth century sunburst Italian mirror? James, as he is executed all episode, notably with the chairs, permits Laurie her huge moment: He asks the value. About $1800. Man, she likes that number. Dates, costs, if it's not in the 1800 vary it's not price it. The inclusion of fabric, of course, requires an incidental 500% markup. You've by no means requested for one before, why begin now? Doug decides, as soon as the countertop is in, to take the unprecedented move of asking someone (namely, Barbie) for an opinion. She would not prefer it. Surprise! Though, for as soon as, I agree with Barbie fully. A pattern (marble, granite, and so forth.) would look better than solid white. Doug, performing one other marvel in a day already full of wonders, explains his reasoning: "In order for me to place a quality countertop in here and not go together with a laminate, the one factor obtainable is Corian Glacier White." So, was this a cost difficulty, a listing difficulty, what? "Give it an opportunity, as a result of what's going to happen is, by the things you placed on the countertops and accessorizing it, and we throw in pops of shade, it's all gonna work. And, and, it is gonna... we'll put some life into this place, okay? I think in the long run you're gonna prefer it." I translated that as saying "It could be a pig, however we have not put the lipstick on it but." Whatever you put on it, it is nonetheless gonna be a stark white countertop. You can't bury it all! Geometry for rank newcomers: Ty moves bits of the cocktail table round semi-purposelessly as Laurie appears on. Ty appears to be going for a cube. No spanking, so we'll pop some bubble paper. Paige, cruelly snuffing out bubble paper bubbles, declares that the time has come for Tina and James to start the elusive Paige Gift hunt. Tina and James need to get an entire dwelling leisure library. Paige appears unimpressed. Tina wins the onscreen coin toss and will be off on the hunt. Damn, no low cost intercourse jokes this time. Happiness is a heat gun. Give one to Doug. No, wait, give it to ME! The place that Amy Wynn took her magnum opus, the mahogany table, to be sanded, took over 3/8 of an inch - almost A HALF AN INCH - off the desk, so now the nails that she punched into the underside of the table are displaying by the top. Doug needs names and addresses of the perpetrators. At least, till Amy Wynn factors out that she must faucet in all the nails, leaving an ugly pattern. After that, Doug simply says they won't see it after he stains it. Yeah, except there's still a bunch of nails sticking out the underside of the table! I would like Doug's title and tackle, then. Oh, wait, I have his identify. Also, because abusing the mahogany with stain wasn't unhealthy enough, he has to rush-job it and stain the maple along with the mahogany, something Amy Wynn cannot guess at the outcome of. Doug admits that he doesn't know either. Amy Wynn appears to be like about as ticked off as I can be if I spent two days on one thing and had someone come alongside and want to screw round with it in methods even HE doesn't understand. How many butchers did it's a must to kill for that, then? Members of Doug's military are rubbing butcher's wax on the partitions for reasons I fail to understand. Speed up! Speed up! Make pizza out of the cameraman! The limo from the shopping journey yesterday artfully stops in front of a cameraman who's busy catching Tina's first glimpse of the limo. Yo, yo, yo! Ty 'State' Pennington is in tha hizzy! Word! The pre-business bumper is Ty, confirming my suspicions, in full purple and leopard-print gear, including the bling-bling ring and phat necklace from yesterday. He looks like an additional from Pimps at Sea. Speaking of whoring.... Sony Vega ad quantity three, not counting in-present product placement. Rewind time: What? An advert for the hundred grand present? I'm WATCHING IT! Oh, it's the encore. I idly observe that they had a black limo in the advert, and a white one in-show. I'm additionally reminded of what a total goddess Amy Wynn is when she's not dressed in butch carpenter gear. Now, we need to see about not dressed, interval. Awwwww. Tina gets all choked up in regards to the surprise of all that's happened. Gun! I would like the freaking gun! Doug, with Barbie at his aspect as a result of Amy Wynn's in all probability in the fetal place someplace, just isn't happy with the "professional" sanding on the table. The staining has made apparent what seems like abrasion traces from the sanding. But, not like Doug, I'm also sad with the staining: It looks like someone took a flamethrower to the desk. (Meanwhile, Ty's masterworks, the great-wanting shelves and fireplace mantle, are being installed.) Doug decides to get the stain off the maple, then tape the maple up LIKE HE Should HAVE Done IN The first PLACE, restain any unstained mahogany, then oil-rub the entire table. Doug: I hope Birnam Wood marches to your house and kicks your ass! Ewwwww. Tina units Paige up for disaster by using this logic: $One thousand divided by $20/CD or DVD = 500 gadgets. First off, no one in the same universe as the RIAA pays that little for a CD newer than 1995 vintage. DVD's ain't low cost either. Second, taxes. Finally, $1000/$20 = 50. Looks like Paige is gonna be the one being instructed she's gone overbudget for a change. As they stand on the checkout, Paige (the light happening) imparts this last little bit of wisdom on Tina. Paige has a future profession in authorities price range balancing. Tina asks the cashier if they will begin over. The cashier says yes. The cashier is being paid to say yes. Tina says, cryptically, "Only favorites!" So that you have been going to purchase motion pictures that your neighbors hated...? Hey, it pays higher than 'housewife': As the shelves go up and Laurie plans the tchotchke invasion, she asks Ty how they're going to ever go back to their real jobs. She hastily adds "of Trading Spaces". Ty says "Oh! I thought you meant maintenance." This would be a pleasant approach of firing someone. "It's the smartest thing you've got ever executed. Oh, by the way, pick up two weeks' pay and clear out your locker. Security will escort you out." Woah. Doppelganger second. Paige speaks to the limo driver briefly, giving him a couple of seconds on digital camera to brag to the family with. (Looks.) Woah, man, he appears to be like like an older model of this man I worked with final year! Same hair and every part! HEY BUDDY! You recognize A guy NAMED J.C. McLEAN? MarkNathanorJohn MarkNathanorJohn, who's actually Mark, helps put the fridge in. Despite homeowner John doing all of the pushing, Doug ignores him to appease the corporate Gods and proclaim that "The new black is orange!" (Orange as in the home Depot shirt color.) The corporate Gods need to have this one explained to them, for they suppose it is some form of African-American reference. Run Laurie over! Run a production assistant over! For God's sake, RUN Someone OVER! Paige and Tina get back, still riding within the limo, as Laurie and James look on. Whereas Laurie's usually wailing whereas Paige talks of funds overruns, now that the shoe's on the other foot... ... Laurie's still wailing (about time constraints) and Paige is still speaking about budget overruns. Some issues never change. Maybe we may get together on weekends and you could possibly take orders...? Guys? Guys? General Doug's army lastly disbands. Doug makes some cryptic feedback about the marble for the fireplace. It's common as a result of it's bigger than the universe. Laurie and Paige put a giant painting on the mantle. "It's type of a common painting, 'cause it is a landscape, however yet it is received an abstract(?) quality...." I think it overwhelms the fireplace. Paige makes use of the phrase "Kick it up a notch." Emeril's gonna kick your ass, Paige. BAM! General Doug and his final two soldiers are holed up in a tent in Plymouth.... Doug says it's playtime! Whee! Time to maneuver the furniture in! What? Doug's got one kinky concept of enjoyable. Holy Hell, she said "Heck"! Laurie discusses lacking marble (Oy vey.) and says she knows she didn't put it in her car as a result of it is "heavy as heck". This deserves its own merchandise. Well, no, however I considered this next headline and couldn't pass it up: You misplaced them a long time ago, honey. Oh, it's singular. Never thoughts. After some fairly muted agonizing (for Laurie) about her lost marble, Ty comes along and reads his strains admirably, 'unintentionally' implicating Doug in naughtiness. Paige asks if Laurie's being arrange. Laurie says no. Obviously not, since we have tripped previous the land of most likely-scripted into oh-boy-is-this-faux. Laurie goes on the hunt for Doug. Doug is outdoors hiding a tile cutter and tossing marble away from stated cutter. Laurie sneaks up behind him - he should borrow some of Ty's magic early warning system mojo - and confronts him. The most memorable part being when Laurie says "You may run, darling, however you cannot disguise!" That's not memorable, what's memorable is that Doug is bobbing up and down (hiding tile) and yet she appears to keep her eyes locked on where Doug's head can be if he weren't bobbing. Is the cue card guy over there or something? The Realm of The Archon vs. The Land of Laurie: The bloody battle for supremacy continues. James, unable to play sounding board for Laurie's worth-tallying ways, publicizes that the lamp shades Laurie purchased are ninety bucks a pop. Tina says "Well, James, we're residing in the Land of Laurie and that is chump change." Best quote all episode. Laurie slips Doug the tongue: That'll keep you reading. Well, actually, she grabs his face, sticks out her tongue, and makes a raspberry noise. Apt punishment for stealing marble tile, to be sure. But given the amount of saliva that can throw, I feel it is shut sufficient to rely as an intimate gesture. Paige, of course, comes alongside and deflates Laurie's balloon by mentioning the electrician thing. Laurie and Paige run away laughing. Doug is left alone, confused and indignant. When will the hurting cease, Paige? But that scene was nice entertainment. In comparison with the Ty/Amy Wynn battle, anyway. Watching Doug nonchalantly toss marble round was a deep and profound experience of high quality that the people of the world ought to be pressured to see for their very own benefit. Quickies: Memorable moments from the ultimate meeting montage: 1) Ty and James hook up the Tv, DVD, and so on. Except they do not use any cables. They by no means use any cables on shows like these. 2) Laurie putting the Italian drapes, mirror, and chair all in one handy place for unity. That, and so Marmaduke can break them all with one badly-aimed leap. Munchies! Ty, ever the gent- oh, used that line earlier than. Ty makes to bust open a bag of chips throughout Laurie's springfall-recent room, all while scuffing the coffee desk along with his footwear. Doug, alternatively, lastly hangs the large lampshade he bought at the highest of the episode. Paige proclaims that time's up whereas roaming round alone at midnight with a flashlight. I suppose Laurie bought her back for that golf cart incident. And if not, I wish to discover a way to blame Laurie anyway. The earlier than and afters make one factor apparent: The rooms swapped colors. The kitchen that was once heavy on yellows and different vivid colours is now blue-gray. The blue-gray dwelling room is now yellow. Chestertown Buff, sorry. Repeated jokes and outdated puns: Ah, the pre-business bumper where Doug's received Laurie slung over his shoulder. If you are expecting some joke about Doug having Laurie all over him, then you are going to be disenchanted. Not because I'm above that, I just couldn't suppose of one to trump the tongue joke. But is Laurie sporting one thing underneath her shirt or is that her unnaturally pale back I'm seeing the place her shirt rides up? Chit-chat time: I'll tell you, after two hours of Laurie in that one outfit, the red sleeveless quantity she has on for the chat is a welcome change. Man, and I thought I used to be pale. Incidentally, Ty's cocktail desk is neat. A bit busy for the room, however neat. Oh, and the worth of the fabric for the curtains? $One hundred twenty per yard. I knew she'd beat Doug. Only technique to trump silk is to seize an imported bolt of Italian fabric. Final finances: $49,300. That misplaced $seven hundred pains Ms. Smith drastically. My opinion on the room? Laurie normal, only extra fabric-obnoxious. Cluttered. Pieces are, for probably the most half, good individually, however the room cannot handle 'em all. The flowers that vanish right at the end of the stop-movement room redo is a nice touch, too. Reveal? Big deal: Did Barbie look not-terribly-amazed when she first opened her eyes? What a part of the room was she taking a look at? John notices the Tv. He's making an attempt to redeem himself, good boy. Paige takes the opening to elucidate that Sony donated the Tv and associated rigging - it wasn't part of the budget. Sure as hell hope they donated the wires too. Overall response: Amazed. Laurie and Ty hid within the kitchen and watched the reveal. Their opinion? Laurie thinks they beloved it. Ty's extra pragmatic: "Who would not?" I think he means the cash amount spent, not the design itself. However the statement's ambiguous enough that I give him factors for uncommon diplomacy. Oh, rattling, I can't hate him now. Ty's feedback to Laurie at the end, throughout her hand-clasping "I'd do that room over and over; I would not change a factor." gesturama, had been fantastic. He asks, "You would not minimize down on a few of the knickknacks?" That and his sarcastic touch upon how the room needed "yet another piece of furnishings" redeemed him. He's back in my good graces, but if it was between him and Amy Wynn, I'd nonetheless assist her chopping his head off. Hate transference: Alternatively.... Judging by her "it will not fit" response to the "one more piece of furniture" remark, Laurie didn't notice Ty was being sarcastic. His easy "Oh, I know that." was amazingly diplomatic, extra so than my "He's being sarcastic, you brainless mass of Italian-fabric-draped ego!" or something to that effect. Let's see what he's cookin' up tonight. Today. Just right. The kitchen's nice, apart from the countertop. Say what you will, the white cupboards plus the white countertop and the halogen lights is just too much. Something must be grey, or one thing rather less bright and stark. Even white with some sample. I simply realized that they moved the stove. Man, that is gonna be a hard room for the homeowners to cook in for some time. Oh, and will the silk drapes survive that near the cooking space? And while with regards to drapes, I'd like to put in a vote in opposition to drapes that drag on the floor like this. You can't make a drape that drags look good! The desk still has shades of flamethrower abuse, although some magic has converted it from godawful to tolerable. Four chairs, no couch. None of them pointing on the Tv, which is excessive over the fireplace and also you'd need to crane your neck to observe it. Or lie down, which you cannot, as a result of there is not any couch! Smooth transfer, Doug. Just had to get a kind of "aesthetic" unusability tricks in there. Paige nails it when she says the flatscreen "Looks like artwork up there!" Translation: You didn't wish to get artwork, and you did not know where to put the Tv, so you killed two birds with one stone. Final finances: $50,000 much less $28. That's spectacular. It can be much more impressive if he'd purchased a painting for the fireplace and stuck the Tv someplace else. Like the place that "artisan" pal of Doug's was working. Two days and all he did artwork-clever was three rectangles of paint? What the hell am I lacking right here? The living room of the kitchen/dwelling/dining room combo is a bit cramped, which makes me assume that Doug does two-and-a-half rooms for Laurie's one. Reveal? Bigger deal: They like the room. Rather a lot, it seems. Tina notices the kitchen's change in flooring plan straight away. Paige does not seem to (or need to) decide up on it and simply keeps speaking about the new stuff. Doug and Amy Wynn just like the heat glow of massive amounts of money and Real Wood. Final verdict: I'm not fond of both one, however mostly for usability issues. Though I wasn't fond of them before, they not less than regarded such as you wouldn't come out of them with neck cramps. We'll say okay job due to the low incidence of fatal screwups. Well.... I do hope you loved these ten thousand plus words, however if you happen to didn't, at least take comfort in my surprise at your studying the whole thing. Goodnight! Beat a hasty retreat to the main page.

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Trading Spaces is owned by these Banyan individuals, or something. TLC's obtained something to do with it, too. I don't personal these. If I did, I'd in all probability fire Laurie. Or have Doug in front of a firing squad.